Adopting Sophie Grace

We’re beginning the paper chase for Sophie’s adoption as well as filling out a number of financial aid applications.  We fully expect Sophie’s Dossier to exceed 100 pages:

• Home Study
• Personal references
• Birth certificates of both parents (original certified copies)
• Marriage licenses (original certified copies)
• Divorce Decrees (original certified copies)
• Detailed Financial Statements
• Previous Year’s Tax Filings
• Bank Account Verification
• Proof of Employment
• Paycheck Stubs
• Police background check providing criminal and child abuse clearances for everywhere you have lived since age 18
• Physician letters evidencing good health for both parents
• Pictures of your home and family

Plus, to help with funding, we have a dozen applications for various grants and loans that may be available.  Many of these are for $500 to $2500 each, and the applications are mostly 7 or 8 pages each, but sore hands are a small price to pay.

We’ve also started our normal rounds of helping others work through their adoptions (actually this is tremendously enjoyable), so if you have any questions about adoption, about our process or about what it could mean for you and your family, please get in touch.

I had a friend tell me yesterday that he admired us because we’re brave for stepping out into this process before everything is figured out. I’m sure that others would probably say that we are foolish for committing to this without a clue where the money is coming from.

After thinking about it for a while, I think they’re both wrong.  We do have everything figured out.  If God is in the middle of this – if it’s in His will – if it will bring Him glory – then He will see it through.  All we need to do is have faith in Him and follow where he leads.  Whether that’s brave or it’s foolish is beside the point.  A little orphan girl needs a family.  God’s told us all to care for orphans.  We’re just trying to do that.

One of the tough things about adoption – and one of the reasons I think some people won’t pursue it – is that you have to tell people your “personal stuff”. You need to tell the government all about what goes on inside your home. You need to tell strangers at the adoption agency all about your finances. You need to ask friends to write letters about your parenting skills and moral character.

In our first adoption, we had great help from our family.  Family members graciously dipped into retirement accounts and made loans, we borrowed against the house for the rest, and it was pretty simple.  In our second adoption, we had wonderful support from friends, and took a personal loan to cover the rest.  It was still pretty easy.

This time around we can’t borrow, we can’t tap retirement accounts, we have no savings left, and so far nobody has stepped up with a big check and a happy grin.  (more…)

We had a call today from our case worker with the adoption agency.  She went over the basics of the process and China adoption in general, even though we knew most of it.  Here’s what she said…

• We need to get to work on our paperwork because it will take weeks to months to get completed.  The new Hague adoption requirements require more paperwork, and our case worker said she will meet with us weekly to help this along.
• China special needs adoption is pretty quick.  While an infant adoption of a NSN (non-special-needs) child can take 30 months or more, our process should take about 5 to 6 months from the time we submit our dossier until the time we fly to China.
• In the next few weeks we will send a Letter of Intent – which they will help us prepare – which is our first official contact with China.  We should hear back a few weeks later that we are pre-approved.
• There is a lot of paperwork and we need to get it going (did I mention that before?)

We’re very excited – we’re one step closer to bringing Sophie Grace home.

It seems like actually filling out the application is the one step we dread. Maybe it’s because this is like jumping off a cliff, you can’t un-send something like this.  Maybe it’s because they ask a lot of personal questions.  Maybe it’s just because it’s long.  Whatever the reason, out of the whole process, this is the step that we like least.

We stayed up late to fill out the application (a dozen pages) but finally sent it off just past midnight.  This agency had some pretty standard stuff – a complete financial statement, lists of references and personal information, etc.  They also had a section asking about our faith which is very refreshing.  They are very Christian, which I think is a good thing.  Take a look at our family page to hear more about this.

We got word back today about Sophie’s file – and pictures too (YAY!!) – and the agency people think that she would fit perfectly in our family. She is living in north-central China right now and is generally healthy.  She was born prematurely and has grown very slowly, and is about the size of a 9-month to 1-year-old girl here in the US, even though she’s 3 now.  She’s outgoing and happy, and her caregivers are taking good care of her, but we really believe that she is meant to be with us.  We don’t know much about her background, but we’re sure to find out a little more as we go.

Next up – application time!

We’ve been praying about a girl on Lifeline’s site called Amber.  One thing we like is that she is not Case # 4563 to them – they give every case a name instead of a number.  She’ll be called Sophie if it is God’s will to bring her to our home.

Lynn took the leap of sending the email to them asking about her and telling them a little bit about us.  If they think there is a fit, they’ll ask us to fill out their application to officially start the process.  We’re more than a little nervous about this right now, but we know that if God is in it, it will happen.

We’ve been thinking about adopting again for a while, but we just got more serious.  A friend of ours, Cynthia, recommended her agency Lifeline Children’s Services.  We’re looking at the waiting children (or special needs) programs in various countries, but this agency looks like they have the right ethics and approach, and Cynthia had nothing but good things to say about them.  One thing we’ve learned is that references count, so we always ask about the agency before we talk to them.